Training for Defeat
In our Formula One lifestyle we are orientated to be prepared to take every turn in the road at life-threatening speed and be ready to overtake! We are flooded by books, TV, films, and myriads of direct and indirect messages that tells us to step up the pace or be left behind. I always thought that it did not affect me – I was invincible!
To my utter disapointment I realised the opposite. We picture that there are people out there that were born that way. By ‘that way’ I mean they were born with a remote in their hand, a mobile fone in the other, and a overpowering desire to prove themselves. We are so fortunate not to be like that! I discovered that within me lies potential – for great things and for terrible things. None of us just wake up one day and realise that we are now that dark figure hiding away somewhere finding delight in all the world has to offer yet never finding de-light (literally and figuratively).
Disgusted, I realised that slowly but surely I was starting to place my hope in things that will most definately disapoint. My desire was after that which does not fulfil. I had to be brutaly honest and ask myself ‘what do I desire’ and because of this ‘where am I heading’? Simple, yet difficult; because you need to become quiet – almost detached. This is not about taking a pit-stop. This is about parking the car and getting out of the race because the finish line could in fact be the end of the line. I thought I was OK just taking the pit-stop every now and again – refueling, new tyres, wipe the helmet – there we go! Now everything is the way it should be and this lap is going to be the best yet. I’ll pass everyone by, leave them in the dust. Oh man I got excited!
…But excited about what?!
I felt defeated, ashamed, even lost. This life is not about a race – it is most definately a journey in which we have the pleasant privelage of stopping, helping others stop, and enjoying that which lies behind (the good and the bad), where we are now (the good and the bad), and where we are going (yip, you guessed it THE GOOD AND THE BAD). I am not a masochist but life will have challenges and our character is determined by how we react to the challenges.
I am therefore gladly training for defeat.